Tip of the Week

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Resourcefulness

Posted on Dec 04 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“The greatest achievement of the human spirit is to live up to one’s opportunities and make the most of one’s resources.”
- Vauvenargues

A Note From Andrea

We’re pleased to announce updates to our website and Coaching Tip of the Week. Go to our website to look at our new Case Studies. Our Coaching Tip of the Week is now a blog. You can comment at the end of the Tip.

Resourcefulness
by Tony Alessandra

Why is it?

Resourcefulness is the ability to cope with new challenges and situations promptly and skillfully as they arise in business. It is the ability to use problem solving methods to creatively channel available resources to meet situations effectively. Typically, being resourceful is a matter of creatively balancing time, energy, effort, capital, and other resources to overcome business obstacles in the most optimal way.

Why is it important?

As a business grows from the infant states throughout all levels of maturity, the demands placed upon the resources of the company are often greater than initially expected. Often these demands require the immediate attention of the entrepreneur. The resourceful entrepreneur will cope with these demands by analyzing the challenges and identifying solutions, often leaving the resources intact.

Resourcefulness allows the entrepreneur to think outside the box when brainstorming solutions to many complicated problems. This ‘out-of-the-box’ thinking often requires the entrepreneur to overcome engrained thinking patterns that control and limit the effectiveness of many businesses. It requires the entrepreneur to evaluate all of the resources available and determine the best allocation for them to meet all the needs facing the business.

It is through resourcefulness that small businesses are able to compete with large established businesses. It is the manner in which many small businesses seem to make something out of nothing.

How to get it if you don’t have it?

Changing thought processes is often difficult and generally takes a significant amount of time. It requires one to retrain the manner in which he or she approaches problem solving opportunities. Each time that a problem is encountered the entrepreneur must take the time to identify as many solutions as possible, often this will require the entrepreneur to ask others for suggestions. As solutions are identified, implement those that will make best use of the resources at hand. Once the solution has been implemented, evaluate the outcome to identify avenues of improvement.

How to develop it if you have it?

Once you have trained yourself to think in a manner that encourages resourcefulness you may further develop this skill by continuing to look for new and different alternatives to your limiting resources. Identifying areas where your resources are not being handled in the most effective manner may aid you in retaining and better utilizing those resources you do have. Begin to log improvements and continue to ask those people around you for suggestions.
Copyright (c) 1996-2008 Alessandra & Associates, Inc. Dr. Tony Alessandra can be reached at www.alessandra.com/products/index.asp or at 1-858-456-0028.
Coaching Call to Action

I picture Dirty Harry asking, “are you feeling lucky?” as I ask, “are you feeling resourceful?” What will you do this week to grow your resourcefulness muscle? Will you ask others to help you with your brainstorming? Are you willing to try out other’s ideas, even if they don’t match your preconceptions? Are you willing to offer your brainstorming skills to others?

I’d love to hear from you about what you discover or what you are thinking about resourcefulness. Please take a minute to comment on my blog.

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We Give Thanks

Posted on Nov 21 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“For all that has been, thanks. For all that will be, yes.”
- Dag Hammarskjold

A Note From Andrea

A very Happy Thanksgiving to you all! I wish to express my gratitude to you for sharing your ideas, thoughts, feedback, challenges and successes with me. I am honored to be included in your life and thank you for sharing yourself so fully with me.

There will be no Coaching Tip of the Week on November 28, 2008 due to the Thanksgiving Holiday here in the States. Enjoy this time of thanks and gratitude. Our next tip will be issued on December 5, 2008 announcing changes to our website. Stay tuned!

We Give Thanks

We give thanks for places of simplicity and peace.
May we find such places in ourselves.

We give thanks for places of refuge and beauty.
May be find such places in ourselves.

We give thanks for places of acceptance and belonging.
May we find such places in ourselves.

May we begin to mend the outer world
According to the truth of our inner life.

Adapted from Grace Cathedral, San Francisco, CA. With thanks to Rachel Remen.

Coaching Call to Action

During this Thanksgiving time and every day - give thanks, give thanks, give thanks.

Ideas and Information

November 21, 2008
Being Thankful

A simple activity you can do with your family or friends at the Thanksgiving Day table, or any time you gather at a meal. Go around, one person at a time, and share something that you are thankful for. This can be a person, place, attitude, moment, or object at any place in time. This is best done while holding hands, right palm up, left palm down. The sharing can begin with anyone in the circle, but it should continue person by person in a clockwise manner. One person speaks at a time and while that person is speaking they have the attention of everyone else in the circle.

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Lessons About Leadership

Posted on Nov 14 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“There is nothing noble in being superior to some other man.
The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.”
- Hindu Proverb

Lessons About Leadership
by Robert J. Thomas

Leaders need to remember the importance of interdependence - that life is not just about the business; an organization is a community of human beings.

Leaders need to care about interpersonal relationships and be willing to be cared about.
A leader doesn’t have to be superhuman or have all the answers, no matter how much people may wish it to be so.
Failing is only a step on the path to success.
Trouble doesn’t last forever.
Know what you stand for as a leader before crisis hits; when things are crashing down around you and people are looking for your leadership, it’s too late to figure things out.
Integrity is the only thing you have that is truly yours (Thomas, 2008, p30).

From: Thomas, R. J. (2008). Crucibles of leadership: how to learn from experience to become a great leader. Boston: Harvard Business Press.

Reprinted with permission from the OSU Leadership Center, Ohio State University, Columbus, OH 43210, (614) 292-3114, http://leadershipcenter.osu.edu.

Coaching Call to Action

This is just the beginning. What lessons have you learned about leadership that you would add to this list? Tell me about it in an email and we will share it in a future Tip. Simply email .

Community Involvement

November 20, 2008
Pounce on a Project VIII - 2008

Come join us for the last Pounce on a Project for 2008. What project would you like to get on top of and accomplish before the holiday season begins? Come to Pounce on a Project VIII - 2008. Join Coach Andrea on Thursday, November 20th, from 9:00 a.m. to 12:15 p.m. Eastern. We will join as a group by phone and declare what you want to accomplish: updating your marketing plan, writing your newsletter for the month, written performance reviews, or making cold calls.

During the morning, the group will gather by phone a few times to check progress and get any support needed to finish with a bang. At noon, the group will celebrate their accomplishments. Who says projects have to be boring and tedious? Bring your lightness and fun and join us for the energization.

To sign up or learn more, call or by noon on Wednesday, November 19th. Feel free to share this with friends and co- workers, the more the merrier. (Cost of the program is only the cost of long distance phone calls.)

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What’s YOUR Personal Best?

Posted on Nov 07 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another.”
– Helen Keller

What’s YOUR Personal Best?
by Nancy Gerber

A few weeks ago, as I was getting ready to jump into the pool to do my laps, I observed an older gentleman finishing up his swim. As he emerged from the water up the ladder, it was apparent that he had almost no movement in his lower body.

What caught my attention was how fully present and in the moment he was. His focus was completely on getting himself out of the pool and to the nearby bench where he’d left his bag. He did not allow himself to be distracted. Every slow, painstaking action was well thought out, conscious and deliberate. Each movement fed into the next; no motion was wasted. It was obvious that he’d done this many times before.

I saw no signs of frustration, anger or embarrassment — even at the point where he literally had to pull himself, inch by inch, across several feet of concrete pool deck to reach his destination. His patience with and acceptance of himself and his situation was striking.

Sometimes, when I’m tempted to slide into pressure or self-criticism, when I get angry at myself for not being “perfect”, I remember this man accomplishing his personal best — one millimeter at a time.

Copyright 2008 by Nancy Birnbaum-Gerber. All rights reserved. Used with permission. Nancy Gerber, Professional Certified Coach and President of Stepping Stones can be reached at http://www.sstones.com.

Coaching Call to Action

What happens when you shift from trying to be perfect to doing your personal best right now?

Community Involvement

November 7, 2008
Accomplishing Goals that Truly Matter at Westboro Tennis & Swim Club

Learn and experience how to identify what’s important to you and then create and achieve goals that fit your priorities through this interactive, thought provoking and inspirational 6-step program. This seminar is scheduled for Wednesday, November 12th from 6:30 to 8:30 at the Westboro Tennis & Swim Club in Westboro, MA. For more information, or to register, please call 508-366-1222.

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Trains of Thought

Posted on Oct 31 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“An emotion is always the result of a thought. The quality of the emotion equals the quality of the thought.”
– Roger Mills and Elsie Spittle

Trains of Thought
by Michael Neill

I have always liked the expression “train of thought”, because it so accurately describes the way each thought which passes through our head invites us to travel with it wherever it may lead. One thought of a childhood friend can lead you on a pleasant journey all the way back down through your youth; one thought about an argument with a loved one can carry you into paroxysms of rage or daydreams of escaping into the arms of another.

Yet our thoughts are never real - they are simply internal conversations and mental movies which have no power to impact our lives until we charge them up by deciding they are important. And if we “empower” the wrong thoughts, making our negative fantasies seem more real than our external reality, it is like boarding a train to a destination we have no desire to actually reach.

That’s why the important thing to realize about your thinking, particularly your “unhappy” thinking is this:

It’s never the first thought that hurts - it’s the fifth, or fiftieth, or even five hundredth which inevitably comes when you follow a negative train of thought on its rambling journey to destinations unknown.

This raises an important question:

If you’re never quite sure where a train of thought will lead you, how do you know which thoughts to engage with and which ones to let go?

The answer, at least for me, lies not in our thoughts but in our feelings. Simply put, when you’re feeling good (happy, loving, comfortable, easy, well, etc.), your thinking will probably take you in positive directions as well. When you’re feeling bad (unhappy, stressed out, uncomfortable, unwell, etc.), chances are whichever thought you might engage with will lead you somewhere you don’t really want to go.

In this sense, you can use your feelings as a sort of an early warning system, like a traffic light for trains of thought:

If you’re feeling bad, that’s like a red light warning you to disengage from whatever toxic thoughts are on your mind. You don’t have to try to “stop thinking” - just don’t climb aboard the train and don’t fall for the sense of false importance and sudden urgency your thoughts might seem to have.
If you’re feeling somewhat neutral, that’s like a yellow light which says “proceed with caution”. It’s possible that the thoughts racing through your mind are worth paying attention to, but if you feel your mood begin to drop, jump off whatever train of thought you may have been travelling on and wait until your mood rises again to re-engage with your thinking.
If you’re feeling good, you’ll tend to think higher quality thoughts - and those thoughts can lead you to some pretty wonderful places.

In “You Can Have What You Want“, I share the story of how I finally learned as a teenager to recognize the difference between the suicidal trains of thought which had occupied my thinking for years and any actual desire to end my life. Once I recognized “the suicide thought” as just a thought, no more significant than any other, I was able to quickly let it go each time it arose. By not getting “on the train”, my sense of fear and suffering diminished overnight.

In the same way, if you choose to not act on your thinking when you’re feeling low, you’ll find that as your mood lifts, the quality of your thinking will lift with it - and when you climb aboard a quality train of thought, it can take you a long way towards living the life of your dreams.

Coaching Call to Action

Take a few minutes to watch your thoughts today, the way you might watch sticks floating down a stream or river. Although you may get caught up in the “thought stream” from time to time, return to the river bank as often as you can.
Notice your mood throughout the day today. When you’re feeling up, tune in to your thinking and give yourself the freedom to climb aboard whatever trains of thought may strike your fancy. When you’re feeling low, do your best to center yourself in the present moment, recognizing that no matter how urgent or pressing a course of action may seem, chances are “it’s just a thought”.

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Promote Constructive Insubordination

Posted on Oct 24 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.”
– Mahatma Gandhi

Promote Constructive Insubordination
by James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner

Leaders have to be able to promote, demonstrate, and support constructive insubordination. It’s been said that ‘if both of us are always agreeing, then one of us is redundant,’ and this is no more true today. When everyone agrees, especially for the sake of getting along, we’re unlikely to achieve the best results.

We can’t afford to surround ourselves with ‘yes’ people. We need to have people willing to support us and also willing to voice their disagreements. Others will see issues that we don’t see - perhaps never even thought about - and may even come up with a better solution than our own.

We have to make it possible for people to argue with each other - up, down, in, out, and sideways - if we are to realize the best from today’s diverse and talented workforce. We shouldn’t strive to win every skirmish, but instead endeavor to unite in our decisions so that we can win battles that matter most. The legacy that comes from difficult conversations will be far more creative and sustaining than ones that come from people who always see eye to eye. (Kouzes & Posner, 2006, p. 68-70)

Reference: Kouzes, J.M., & Posner, B.Z., (2006). A leader’s legacy. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.

Reprinted with permission from the OSU Leadership Center, Ohio State University, Columbus, OH 43210, (614) 292-3114, http://leadershipcenter.osu.edu.

Coaching Call to Action

Where in your work do you always get agreement? This week ask for disagreement and see what you can learn about the situation, others and yourself.

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Modern Myths: Are They Really As They Seem?

Posted on Oct 17 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.”
– Lou Holtz

Modern Myths: Are They Really As Them Seem?
by Kathy Frank

Traditionally, myths were tales of people defying the laws of nature or going beyond common experiences and often suffering the consequences. Or, they were tales used to explain naturally occurring phenomena. In many cases, myths were just attempts to explain and make sense of the world and try to make it more manageable.

With the rise of scientific rationalism in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries, it was believed myths were no longer needed because science could now provide all the answers and explanations necessary to understand our world. However, it is one thing to know facts and have scientific insights; it is quite another to understand how people actually perceive and integrate this knowledge.

Despite what we think of as our great scientific sophistication, we still understand very little about the motivations and actions of other people. Most of it, like the myths of old, is our subjective perception of the actions and motivations of others and our attempts to understand and explain them. We tend to misjudge people - create myths about them - that can impede productivity and progression in life and business. Maybe these personal myths we create are our attempts “to explain and make sense of the world, thereby making it manageable”. Some examples might be:

“That person is. . .

a snob
full of herself
so detailed s/he can’t get out of her/his own way
not strategic
lacking a sense of humor
too wordy
too quite.”

Human behavior has not changed since the time when myths were first created to explain and manage the world. Science and technology have changed and we have much more knowledge in many areas, but our understanding and management of human behavior is still primitive. How can we dispel a lot of these myths - our subjective false judgments - about people?

In the examples set forth above, perhaps:

A snob might just be someone who is shy and uncomfortable in social settings. Because of that, this “snob” may appear aloof or distant to those more extroverted than s/he.

People who appear to be “full of themselves” may, in fact, be people who love to verbalize their thinking and ideas, get excited about the world and are open in talking about their own accomplishments and achievements.

People who are so detailed they can’t get out of their own way may have a strong need to learn all that they can when moving into new areas/situations because they just don’t want to make a mistake.

When we say someone is not “strategic”, we may really mean s/he does not agree with what we think is important. This may be a flag for us that we need to communicate or sell our plan in a different way. Oftentimes we tend to discard the plan when, in fact, the plan could be right but our approach to selling it is wrong.

When we say someone lacks a “sense of humor”, we may mean they do not communicate in a way which makes us laugh or feel happy. However, we all have a sense of humor, although how it manifests itself depends on many variables, such as geography, education, culture, context, maturity and who we are behaviorally.

When we describe people as “too wordy”, we mean they are given to the use of many words. Could it mean that we are imposing our own style on those “words” perhaps because we are succinct and believe that is the right way to deliver a message?

Or, others may say that someone is “too quiet”. Some of us might just perceive that person as not active, sitting idly by or just day dreaming. However, “still waters tend to run deep” and they may, indeed, have much to contribute to those wise enough to plumb their depths.

We never want to reduce human nature to scientific formulas or mathematical equations. We do not want to eliminate excitement, spontaneity, creativity and fun from human existence. However, in the workplace or any organized activity (e.g., sports), where goals must be met and collaborations must be productive, is it possible to apply some behavioral science to reduce the myth creation - the subjective, fanciful worlds we create about each other which tend to impede communication and understanding?

If human behavior has not changed over the millennia, then at least the means of understanding it has. Those of you who use the Predictive Index (PI) know there is a way to gain objective insights into how to understand people and dispel some of those myths, a way to improve human communications, relationships, and, ultimately individual and organizational productivity.

Kathleen Frank is the President of Augur, Inc. http://www.augurinc.com.

Coaching Call to Action

This week consider where you are “myth making” about the people around you? How else might you interpret their behaviors?

Community Involvement

October 17, 2008
Warm Welcome to Emerson Hospital’s Community Health & Wellness Program Attendees for Empowering Yourself

A warm welcome to our new Coaching Tip of the Week subscribers who I met at Emerson Hospital Wednesday night during my program “Empowering Yourself: 5 Steps for Gaining Control Over Your Life”. I enjoyed sharing my tools for gaining control of your life and participating in the new openings, ideas and visions that people experienced.

October 23, 2008
Pounce on a Project VII - 2008

After taking the summer off from Pouncing, it’s time to get back on track. What project would you like to get on top of and accomplish this month? Come to Pounce on a Project VII - 2008. Join Coach Andrea on Thursday, October 23rd, from 9:00 a.m. to 12:15 p.m. Eastern. We will join as a group by phone and declare what you want to accomplish: updating your marketing plan, writing your newsletter for the month, written performance reviews, or making cold calls.

To sign up or learn more, call or by noon on Tuesday, October 21st. Feel free to share this with friends and co- workers, the more the merrier. (Cost of the program is only the cost of long distance phone calls.)

Ideas and Information

October 17, 2008
Watch Myths Being Dispelled Before Your Eyes with Young @ Heart

“Young @ Heart” is a choir based in Massachusetts that has become so popular they now do tours of Europe. What sets them apart is that the group is made up of senior citizens, ranging in age from 73 to 92, who perform rock songs.

This is an amazing film that is about people stretching beyond their own boundaries, and the boundaries imposed on them by the rest of us, to achieve results that are stirring and soulful. Watch the trailer.

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Medicating with the Mundane

Posted on Oct 10 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“You can not gain peace by avoiding life.”
– Virginia Woolf

Medicating with the Mundane
by Steve Straus

Alcohol. Food. TV. Sex. Drugs. Victimhood. Work. Hobbies.

These, and plenty of other items on the Big List, are ways people avoid unpleasant things. Nobody likes to be in pain, or even to imagine being in pain.

So we medicate. We medicate when we use any substance or behavior to avoid something unpleasant. By medicating we cover up or mask pain.

A surprisingly common, and subtle, way people medicate is to busy themselves with mundane activities. It’s so subtle that most don’t recognize it as a form of medication like that Big List above.

“Ugh. I’ve really got to call that unfriendly client and tell him we’re not going to deliver as promised. But I think I better get my expense reports caught up before I tackle that big call, because no telling how long it’s going to take and Accounting has been at me to get the reports in.”

When you find yourself busy on the mundane, ask “what am I avoiding?” Only through awareness can you discover solutions to your pains.

Coaching Call to Action

What triggers can you put in place to catch yourself doing mundane things?

Community Involvement

October 15, 2008
Empowering Yourself at Emerson Hospital’s Community Health & Wellness

Learn and experience how to reach higher productivity and deeper levels of personal and professional satisfaction through this interactive, thought provoking and inspirational 5-step program. This seminar is scheduled for Wednesday, October 15th, from 7:00 to 9:00 pm at Emerson Hospital, Concord, MA. For more information, or to register, please call 978-287-3777.

October 23, 2008
Pounce on a Project VII - 2008

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Singing Your Song

Posted on Oct 03 2008 | Tagged as: Tip of the Week

Quote of the Week

“You can’t do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.”
– Evan Esar

Singing Your Song
by Phyllis Sisenwine

While visiting with a friend of mine, I noticed a plaque on the wall in her guest bedroom that reads, “The secret of life is to discover your song and the meaning to life is to sing it”.

I found that to be a powerful message, but I also realize that many of us don’t know what our song is. Those of us who do know often don’t create the opportunity to sing it. It reminds me of the movie “City Slickers” with Jack Palance and Billy Crystal. It’s about a man in mid-life who goes to a ranch to discover his song. There’s a scene where Jack Palance says to Billy Crystal, “None of you get it. The secret of life is just one thing. One thing. You stick to that and everything else don’t mean nothing.” Billy Crystal says, “That’s great, but what’s the one thing?” “That’s what you’ve got to figure out”, says Palance.”

Do you know what the one thing is for you? Do you know your song? This is a good time to reflect on the song you need to sing. It’s time to think about your gifts, your passion and to discover your song– your burning desire.

To find your passion start by engaging in activities that inspire you. Find out what really excites you. Are you involved in projects that take lots of time, but don’t allow you to use your unique abilities? Think about eliminating activities that drain your energy. This is a good time to review the past six months and to see where and how you really spent your time. Were you involved in projects that inspired and excited you? Did you spend time doing things that made you smile? Look at your lifestyle. Is it attracting new opportunities?

Take time to listen to your wise self. Unleash your hidden abilities.We all have talents and skills that may not be known to us. Now’s a good time to work on uncovering your gifts.

As author and coach Laura Berman Fortgang writes in Living Your Best Life, we need to excavate our life blueprint. Now that you’ve thought about what you want, you need to act on what you feel. Your thoughts determine the actions you’ll be willing to take. To experience wisdom you have to know what you are feeling. Laura suggests the clues to our best lives are in our subtle feelings, such as sensing the difference between passion and adrenaline or between inspiration and ego. To recognize subtle feelings we must be in a state of calm. Too often we are just too busy, or overwhelmed to find that quiet time.

Think about what you “want” to do vs. what you “should” do. Singing your song is about wants. Take a sheet of paper and make a list of “What I really want and enjoy” Make entries as you think of them. What did you do well years ago that you have stopped doing? What are some of the compliments you often get? What’s easy for you but difficult for others? How do you apply your talents to your work and your life? Ask yourself, if you got all of your joy from one thing, what would it be? Surround yourself with people who inspire and encourage you. The choices you make about the people you spend time with are among your most important choices. When you spend time with people with positive energy you are enriched with support and confidence. Who do you choose to spend time with?

As we look for the one thing that is the secret to our life we need to keep an open mind and be curious about everything.

“The secret of life is to discover your song, and the meaning to life is to sing it.”

Coaching Call to Action

One of the ways to discover your passion(s) is to write your Personal History in bullet format. In this exercise you will find clues that will help you find your passion. This is part of the process I learned while becoming a “Now What” facilitator with Laura Berman Fortgang. Call me at 508-231-0766 if you’d like to learn more.

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