by Dr. Tony Alessandra

There's an old parable about a very educated English gentleman visiting a well-known Buddhist master to see what he could learn from the spiritual teacher. The holy man poured a cup of tea for the Englishman and kept pouring and pouring until there was tea all over the floor.

Finally, the Englishman could not sit silently any longer and asked: "Why are you overfilling the cup?" The Buddhist master replied: "This cup is like your head. It is so full that nothing else will go into it. You must empty yourself first in order to learn anything new from me."

The trait we're discussing -- attentiveness -- works a lot like that. In order to be attentive, we need to empty ourselves of other thoughts and set ways of seeing things. When we use our senses to take in all we can about other people, we can much more accurately adjust our behavior to the needs of others. When we're attentive to situations, we can exercise our power of vision to make positive changes for ourselves and others.

Attentiveness is all about being aware of what's going on in your environment. It can be as simple as noticing when someone is getting bored, to sensing that now's not the right time to put your ideas across. It's knowing when to act and when not to act.

Attentiveness is also the ability to tune into a problem and come up with its essential components. "What's really going wrong here?" That insight provides the basis for envisioning something that will truly work better.

Attentiveness means you're open to outside stimuli entering your field of perception or, if the stimuli are more subtle, entering your intuition. It means you're open to more information coming in through your eyes and ears, through your sense of touch, and through what's known as your kinesthetic sense. That's how your muscles and the organs of your body react. Our bodies can tell us loads about how other people are feeling if we're attentive enough. The ability to be attentive to others allows you the access to the other person's feelings, and sometimes those feelings are mirrored in your own body -- feelings such as fear, sadness, and discomfort. When you pay attention to those feelings within yourself and in others, you will be able to identify potential problems.

Copyright © 1996-2005 Alessandra & Associates, Inc. Dr. Tony Alessandra can be reached at http://www.alessandra.com.

Attentive, aware, attuned. Powerful words bringing powerful results. This week consider your attentiveness in interactions.

1. Are you present?
2. If not, what will you have to do to be present? What do you need to let go of and refocus?
3. If yes, what are you becoming aware of? What shows up?

January 26, 2006
Pounce on a Project 2006

Get a jump start on your key projects for 2006. Join us in January to complete the project that will result in the biggest positive impact on your life or business this month. Come to Pounce on a Project I -- 2006.

Join Coach Andrea on Thursday, January 26, 2005 from 8:30 a.m. to 12:15 p.m. Eastern. We will join as a group by phone and declare what you want to accomplish: finishing your business plan, planning your next marketing piece, backing up your computer before you buy a new one, finishing your website, making those cold calls, organizing your office, simplifying your filing system, or cleaning under your bed.

During the morning, the group will gather by phone a few times to check progress and get any support needed to finish with a bang. At noon, the group will celebrate their accomplishments. Who says projects have to be boring and tedious? Bring your lightness and fun and join us for the energization.

To sign up or learn more, call or e-mail Andrea by noon on January 25th. Feel free to share this with friends and co-workers, the more the merrier. (Cost of the program is only the cost of long distance phone calls.)

Coach Andrea's Coaching Tip of the Week is brought to you by Andrea Novakowski, Master Certified Coach who provides Business and Personal Coaching to Corporations, Businesses, and Individuals. Andrea is a professional coach who partners with people to set goals and create momentum to produce effective results in their business and/or personal lives.

Andrea is available for individual coaching. If you are serious about reaching your goals and living with greater fulfillment and satisfaction, consider using a coach. To schedule a COMPLIMENTARY initial consultation, send an e-mail to Andrea at
andrea@coachandrea.com.

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Coach Andrea
Focusing your vision, achieving results

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